A friend told me to be blogging every Friday so I'm making a special effort too...though technically its around 1.30 am on Saturday...potato,potayto..
My niece is becoming a teenager. She's twelve going on Hollywood. Today's kids are a scary lot, they have strange music to listen to, they don't play outside as much as we did, they are so technologically savvy at an early age. My five year old niece told my sister-in-law that she wants an ipad for her birthday and I wouldn't be surprised if she actually knew how to use it...
When songs come on television I feel like I'm being bombarded by the noise of monkeys hitting on cans. The songs don't make sense and the dressing or lack thereof is particularly alarming. My niece wants to be just like Rihanna. So I asked her what exactly she liked in Rihanna. She says she wants to be pretty and famous.......No there is nothing else more profound if you are waiting for it. I don't know about the rest of you but that scares me. She spends hours with her friends poring over magazines with the latest fashion (which to me consists of wearing either your en year old sister's clothes or pre-shrinking them then squeezing your mass into it)
I have become a really suspiscious person because of it. I toy with the idea of reading pages of her diary or listening in on her conversations with her friends...ok so I'm a bit neurotic but anyone with a teenager in the house would identify. They mature so fast now, whenever she is in her home wear a few eyes will loook at her a bit longer than I'm comfortable with (or so it seems to me) so I think I will make a T-shirt that says "I'm 12" "I'm not legal yet" "Feel like some jailtime?" "chemical castration is a reality" :) sigh...wouldn't that be nice...
God bless
Friday, February 10, 2012
Thursday, January 19, 2012
IT AINT EASY
I make no apologies for who I am because it took me time to get to where I am today and the journey was not always rosy, not always fun. I still have a very long way to go but I'm still proud of the far I've come.
With help and without.
It's not easy being a human being: You've been given the gift of life and you have to make the most of the opportunity. Humanity is hard to grasp and the fact that you are there with billions of other people that you have to live and cope with make it that much more complicated. They say everybody is unique in their ways and interactions which means one needs to be equipped to deal with different personalities throughout one's life. Your three close friends, your twenty something workmates, your fifty something neighbors, your one hundred and something relatives...challenge much? And Lord knows there will be those people you will just not understand. The ones you talk to or come across that you just want to grab like a teapot and shake the bejesus out of them...or slap both sides of their faces..or just..... (ok you get the idea I guess). Its just not possible to get along with everyone no matter how hard you try. Be pious, be bad, be smart, be kind....there will always be someone who thinks you exist way below worms on the food chain. So just be yourself.
It's not easy being a daughter: Here you are born into a loving family and as you grow you realise there are certain things expected of you that they may not necessarily tell you. My parents were pushers, they always thought of the enormous potential I had in my 5"5 52kg body :) My first ever exam in primary school I was number one, yes they were happy but they left room just to make sure it wasn't a fluke of fate, come 2nd tern and 3rd term and the results were the same...aaahhh there was no going back from there. I had already set a precedence for myself. Late nights reading, extra tuition, 10 kg bags full of books on my back...the works..I had no excuse and I hope I didn't disappoint. All that's left now...maybe delivery of cattle hehe
It's not easy being a sister: In my family I'm a sister to five and the last born too. Growing up there have been fights, laughs, tears, insults, inspiration....just about every human emotion imaginable. Being a sister for me involved a whole lot of things and the most memorable ones were covering up for my brothers and sister when they went partying or took out the car without my dad's permission. In return, my brothers terrorised every Kamau, Onyango, Wafula who came to the gate and dared to ask for me :)I have a very wild band of siblings so someone had to be the totally good one in the house. It wasn't much fun but it sure did have its perks...blackmail (buahahaha *cough cough* hahaha *evil laughter)
This post could be much longer than this but I like to give tasty vibe in morsels. I will live to write another day even on that chariot (or whichever means of transport we will be taking to the pearly gates) *shug*
God bless
With help and without.
It's not easy being a human being: You've been given the gift of life and you have to make the most of the opportunity. Humanity is hard to grasp and the fact that you are there with billions of other people that you have to live and cope with make it that much more complicated. They say everybody is unique in their ways and interactions which means one needs to be equipped to deal with different personalities throughout one's life. Your three close friends, your twenty something workmates, your fifty something neighbors, your one hundred and something relatives...challenge much? And Lord knows there will be those people you will just not understand. The ones you talk to or come across that you just want to grab like a teapot and shake the bejesus out of them...or slap both sides of their faces..or just..... (ok you get the idea I guess). Its just not possible to get along with everyone no matter how hard you try. Be pious, be bad, be smart, be kind....there will always be someone who thinks you exist way below worms on the food chain. So just be yourself.
It's not easy being a daughter: Here you are born into a loving family and as you grow you realise there are certain things expected of you that they may not necessarily tell you. My parents were pushers, they always thought of the enormous potential I had in my 5"5 52kg body :) My first ever exam in primary school I was number one, yes they were happy but they left room just to make sure it wasn't a fluke of fate, come 2nd tern and 3rd term and the results were the same...aaahhh there was no going back from there. I had already set a precedence for myself. Late nights reading, extra tuition, 10 kg bags full of books on my back...the works..I had no excuse and I hope I didn't disappoint. All that's left now...maybe delivery of cattle hehe
It's not easy being a sister: In my family I'm a sister to five and the last born too. Growing up there have been fights, laughs, tears, insults, inspiration....just about every human emotion imaginable. Being a sister for me involved a whole lot of things and the most memorable ones were covering up for my brothers and sister when they went partying or took out the car without my dad's permission. In return, my brothers terrorised every Kamau, Onyango, Wafula who came to the gate and dared to ask for me :)I have a very wild band of siblings so someone had to be the totally good one in the house. It wasn't much fun but it sure did have its perks...blackmail (buahahaha *cough cough* hahaha *evil laughter)
This post could be much longer than this but I like to give tasty vibe in morsels. I will live to write another day even on that chariot (or whichever means of transport we will be taking to the pearly gates) *shug*
God bless
Sunday, January 8, 2012
I LOVE MY CHICKEN BODY
I love my chicken body! Bet I got your attention with that one. :)
I recently read this book written by a couple of women who embrace their perceived inequities so I though I would do the same.
I LOVE my chicken body but shhh... don't say it out too loud lest it becomes my definition. I have those kinds of physiques that resemble a chicken: small head, big on the back and skinny legs that make you wonder if they provide much support. It sometimes makes me wonder what kind of criteria my genes used when they were sorting themselves out to create form.
My small head, a bit tricky to work with especially because I can't exactly pull off all the hairstyles on the salon poster. I love short hair, but then again I get scared of the unseen corners that might be lurking under there so I dare not. And I think my father knows this too because when I told him I had been toying with the idea of cutting my hair he flat out told me that I would look like ET's mentally challenged sister (ok ok he didn't say THAT...exactly) he just said that I should not find my way back home if I got rid of my hair. Frankly, I think he was just apprehensive that I might not be a quite a big catch after and hence deplete his future dowry cow stock :)
Big on the back..true heritage of a Luhya woman. Can be a bit of a burden sometimes. True story, especially when you wear totally flat shoes that place weight on your heels you tend to feel like you've wrapped a small sack of flour around your bum area. It reminds me of the Baganda who are famous for their booty gyrating dances and traditional outfits called Gomes. They elaborately place towels and pieces of blankets to enhance the size of the posterior. So who am I to complain? :)
Finally my oh so skinny legs. Sometimes i envy those women with fat legs because they look like they have so much character (the legs not the person). But I got to thinking, my legs DO have their own character. Just like me, a bit awkward, a bit offish but fitting. That's me.
I'm embracing me, chicken body and all. Figure 8's are overrated. And who wants to look like you've been pinched in the middle anyway.
Love yourself
Love your inequities and your offish qualities
You'll live better for it
Guaranteed.
Much love,
Chickeny :)
I recently read this book written by a couple of women who embrace their perceived inequities so I though I would do the same.
I LOVE my chicken body but shhh... don't say it out too loud lest it becomes my definition. I have those kinds of physiques that resemble a chicken: small head, big on the back and skinny legs that make you wonder if they provide much support. It sometimes makes me wonder what kind of criteria my genes used when they were sorting themselves out to create form.
My small head, a bit tricky to work with especially because I can't exactly pull off all the hairstyles on the salon poster. I love short hair, but then again I get scared of the unseen corners that might be lurking under there so I dare not. And I think my father knows this too because when I told him I had been toying with the idea of cutting my hair he flat out told me that I would look like ET's mentally challenged sister (ok ok he didn't say THAT...exactly) he just said that I should not find my way back home if I got rid of my hair. Frankly, I think he was just apprehensive that I might not be a quite a big catch after and hence deplete his future dowry cow stock :)
Big on the back..true heritage of a Luhya woman. Can be a bit of a burden sometimes. True story, especially when you wear totally flat shoes that place weight on your heels you tend to feel like you've wrapped a small sack of flour around your bum area. It reminds me of the Baganda who are famous for their booty gyrating dances and traditional outfits called Gomes. They elaborately place towels and pieces of blankets to enhance the size of the posterior. So who am I to complain? :)
Finally my oh so skinny legs. Sometimes i envy those women with fat legs because they look like they have so much character (the legs not the person). But I got to thinking, my legs DO have their own character. Just like me, a bit awkward, a bit offish but fitting. That's me.
I'm embracing me, chicken body and all. Figure 8's are overrated. And who wants to look like you've been pinched in the middle anyway.
Love yourself
Love your inequities and your offish qualities
You'll live better for it
Guaranteed.
Much love,
Chickeny :)
Thursday, December 8, 2011
WHEN MY FACE MET BARRY
I had to end the new year with a bang so this past Saturday I took my girlfriend Adi and went to get a Marilyn Monroe piercing at Barry's Piercings in Westlands.
The anxiety was so apparent from the morning when i stepped out of bed and my brain recalled that I was due to get an extra hole on my face that day. I can barely remember much of what transpired during most of the day so will get right down to business and describe the "deed".
Its always important when going through life to surround yourself with friends who can help you get through the hard, tough and just-wanna-pull-out-your-hair days. Those friends who will bail you out when you get into sh**, hold your hair up when you puke after a night of drink binging,......well, you get my drift. My friend Adi is not that type. She is in-your-face, tell-you-when-you're-wrong, take-you-comfort-eating...basically all the good stuff :) When you're going to get your appendix pulled out...take your mother. When you're going for a fight...take Adi!! :)
I digress, so off we went to get the piercing. It wasn't the huge needle so much that freaked me out, or the smell of antiseptic reminding me of a hospital ward, it's the fact that Barry wasn't nearly as pierced as I thought he would be. I kinda expected a professional piercer to be passionate about his work so much so as to be a walking billboard of his art. I can gross you out and go into details about the clamp holding my lip, or the long thick needle that was so sharp it penetrated layers of skin in seconds, or the huge amount of blood that gushed out and was stopped just as fast. But I won't....hehehehe.
Apart from the numbness and the feeling of having a stud through my upper lip, i was doing pretty good. Went for Wamathai December and even went for drinks after. The swollen face the next day caused a panic. I had vivid visions of my face turning green and possibly decaying...yish...so i quickly searched for the Barry's number on the receipt only to come across a line that said
"Do not consume alcohol during the healing process" Sh**!!!!!!
In the past few days I've gone through a myriad of emotions and conspiracy theories about piercings, sleeping with a pocket mirror under my pillow so I can periodically wake up to check if my face has swallowed the stud, late night Google searches for aftercare of lip piercings and symptoms of infections...in short according to Google i was going to DIE!!!!!!!!!!!
Its been almost a week since I jumped off the sane cliff and I'm just still on free fall but according to Barry I'm gonna fall on a soft cushy surface real soon, no need to worry :)
Oh...if only it were that easy, Barry. If only.
The anxiety was so apparent from the morning when i stepped out of bed and my brain recalled that I was due to get an extra hole on my face that day. I can barely remember much of what transpired during most of the day so will get right down to business and describe the "deed".
Its always important when going through life to surround yourself with friends who can help you get through the hard, tough and just-wanna-pull-out-your-hair days. Those friends who will bail you out when you get into sh**, hold your hair up when you puke after a night of drink binging,......well, you get my drift. My friend Adi is not that type. She is in-your-face, tell-you-when-you're-wrong, take-you-comfort-eating...basically all the good stuff :) When you're going to get your appendix pulled out...take your mother. When you're going for a fight...take Adi!! :)
I digress, so off we went to get the piercing. It wasn't the huge needle so much that freaked me out, or the smell of antiseptic reminding me of a hospital ward, it's the fact that Barry wasn't nearly as pierced as I thought he would be. I kinda expected a professional piercer to be passionate about his work so much so as to be a walking billboard of his art. I can gross you out and go into details about the clamp holding my lip, or the long thick needle that was so sharp it penetrated layers of skin in seconds, or the huge amount of blood that gushed out and was stopped just as fast. But I won't....hehehehe.
Apart from the numbness and the feeling of having a stud through my upper lip, i was doing pretty good. Went for Wamathai December and even went for drinks after. The swollen face the next day caused a panic. I had vivid visions of my face turning green and possibly decaying...yish...so i quickly searched for the Barry's number on the receipt only to come across a line that said
"Do not consume alcohol during the healing process" Sh**!!!!!!
In the past few days I've gone through a myriad of emotions and conspiracy theories about piercings, sleeping with a pocket mirror under my pillow so I can periodically wake up to check if my face has swallowed the stud, late night Google searches for aftercare of lip piercings and symptoms of infections...in short according to Google i was going to DIE!!!!!!!!!!!
Its been almost a week since I jumped off the sane cliff and I'm just still on free fall but according to Barry I'm gonna fall on a soft cushy surface real soon, no need to worry :)
Oh...if only it were that easy, Barry. If only.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
UNTITLED 8
If all you see
Is the mad in me
The crazy, the insane
The psycho battles I face
Then what you see
Is really but part of me
I like to think
I'm wonderfully bad,
fancifully confused,
beautifully twisted,
serenely lost
If all you see
Is the mad in me
Then you need to redefine
What mad really is.
Is the mad in me
The crazy, the insane
The psycho battles I face
Then what you see
Is really but part of me
I like to think
I'm wonderfully bad,
fancifully confused,
beautifully twisted,
serenely lost
If all you see
Is the mad in me
Then you need to redefine
What mad really is.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
UNTITLED 7
When I said I loved you
Did you believe me?
When I chose that moment to tell you
Was it the right one?
Immediately after I said it
I looked at you
And a momentary shadow of doubt
Crossed my mind
Do I?
Then as quickly as the doubt came
It disappeared.
I don't love you....
What I feel
Surpasses words
Worlds....
And creates...
Unparalleled...
Its own voice of reason
Do I love you?
Yes and No
There's just...
No existence without you.
Did you believe me?
When I chose that moment to tell you
Was it the right one?
Immediately after I said it
I looked at you
And a momentary shadow of doubt
Crossed my mind
Do I?
Then as quickly as the doubt came
It disappeared.
I don't love you....
What I feel
Surpasses words
Worlds....
And creates...
Unparalleled...
Its own voice of reason
Do I love you?
Yes and No
There's just...
No existence without you.
Friday, November 11, 2011
UNTITLED 6
Another place
Another time
Another choice
Another me
What would I be
Sometimes I wonder
Would it be better
Would it be worse?
For sure
It would be different.
Different stories
Different people
Who would they be?
I wouldn't mind
Because sometimes
I feel I would fit
Anywhere.....
But here.
Another time
Another choice
Another me
What would I be
Sometimes I wonder
Would it be better
Would it be worse?
For sure
It would be different.
Different stories
Different people
Who would they be?
I wouldn't mind
Because sometimes
I feel I would fit
Anywhere.....
But here.
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